She was fucking me, fucking this friend of mine, and fucking The Reverend Father too. Now I learnt she’s had three abortions, recently. I’m sure none of us Brothas know whose babies they were. Gosh! to think she calls me “baby”. I wonder what nicks she calls my friend? “sucker” perhaps- and whether she calls The Father baby too? You just never know with these Daughters of Eve.

What does a man think of when’s he’s got a hard on? I know I wasn’t thinking about consequences that time, when I first got her laid. I know also that all the thinking I was doing under the influence of the surging testosterone , were coming from my midriff. When I first fucked Gloria, it was one of those spur of the moment things- when a light just suddenly go up in your head and you begin to see things in different shades. I had visited her in her family home after Church; We got talking about Holy Mass, shit and stuff, and we’d begun to cuddle and kiss passionately. We had a hot sex right on the carpet of her family living room, with the doors and windows open and the kids playing noisily on the veranda. They could have walked in on us, but they never did, or they did, but I never get to know about it. And that was one of my sweetest sexcapades ever, and the beginning of countless steamy and adventurous sex romps with Gloria.

Now women are state of the art perfection. I love women, and I adore them. But I have begun to rethink my sexuality lately. I am going gay, if the bone of my own bone, and flesh of my own flesh don’t swallow my hooked bait soon. I mean this, I have never meant anything more than this, not even the Apostles Creed. Worse case scenario, I will declare celibacy for life. Sexuality has been my one insecure line of attraction to women, I want a sure deal now.

I have always deluded myself thinking that my greatest attraction to the womens’ folk was their intelligence and intuitive perception of what a man wants. Women (most women) are very intelligent and intelligence in the “weaker sex” has great fascination for me- oh lawdy, the inspiring kinks. I saw, or thought I saw, in Gloria the same disposition I saw in Oprah Winfery, in Naomi Campbell or Michelle Obama. I am the most blessed amongst Men to have made the acquaintances of Tosin- my Rocket Scientist Girlfriend, my Wordsmith Genius amor Jumoke, and My Mona Lisa Look-alike chic Aisha, and Nkechi my Quantum Physicist companion, and Comfort The Diplomat. But this Gloria of a girl was a mirage. I wonder what I was smoking when I fell for her ouvres.

It comes to some as a surprise that I love and adore women- intelligent women; me, I am not surprised: I love and adore My Mother and My Sister. Other women are folks Mothers and Sisters. The people who have misunderstand my stand, sadly are women- mostly. But I am not ashamed. I have such great capacity to love, and I have an inexhaustible supply of affection that I need a harem of women of substance to realize my full potentials. But I have never been lucky in my relationships. There is always this Frankenstein complex in the women I fall in love with and date. They always enter my life- coming in gently as doves, and they always exit- slithering away like serpents.

The shock of my recent realization with Gloria leaves me choking on the forbidden apple I have gorged myself on. Gloria could have known better than fuck my friend- same dude who takes tutorials from me on Feminology. She can never commit a more unforgivable sin than fuck The Reverend Father and not tell. Her jealous sister, Sandra, who has a pathological crush on me had blown the whistle on her. The shit hit the fan and some got spattered on my face; ‘cos I was looking up to heaven and asking God “What The Fuck?”


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